Motherhood, Ultramarathon training as Mom, and Letting Go of Perfection with Francesca Barbetta

Episode: S6E16 | Guest: Francesca Barbetta, certified run coach | Aired May 14, 2026 | 57 min

Author: Nick Klastava

Podcast Hosts: Nick Klastava & Amanda Katz

Listen: Spotify | Apple Podcasts | YouTube

Fresh off completing her first 50-mile ultramarathon on Mother’s Day weekend, run coach and mom of three Francesca Barbetta joined us to talk about the realities of ultra training, balancing motherhood with big goals, and learning to let go of perfection in the process.

Key Takeaways

•             Marathon culture’s obsession with Boston qualifying times can quietly steal the joy out of running for people who don’t share that specific goal.

•             Progress isn’t linear. Missing a run here and there over a training block isn’t a failure, it’s normal, as long as missing doesn’t become the pattern.

•             Fitness isn’t a ladder you climb and hold forever. Stepping back to recover is what lets you go higher next time, not a step backward.

•             Mom guilt around training time is real, but protecting time for yourself often makes you a more present, less overstimulated parent.

•             Run streaks and back-to-back races without recovery are a common warning sign of an unhealthy relationship with training, not dedication.

•             Fueling every run, even short ones, was one of the biggest factors in Francesca’s ability to handle ultra distances without breaking down.

From Marathon Pressure to UltraMarathon training as a Mom

Francesca had run nine ultras before deciding to take on 50 miles, but her path there started with frustration in the marathon world: a growing culture where anything short of a Boston qualifier or sub-three finish can feel undervalued. Moving into ultras stripped that pressure away entirely. Completing the distance became the win, not a specific time, and that shift alone changed her entire relationship with racing. She built up to the 50-miler deliberately, including an unofficial self-supported 41-mile run when a race got canceled, rather than jumping straight from marathon to ultra distance.

Training Around Real Life, Not an Ideal Schedule

Francesca’s actual training week is refreshingly simple: three easy days around 60-70 minutes, one speed session that can run longer, one strength day, and a single long run, done on Fridays before work whenever possible so weekends stay protected for her kids. She runs in the high 40s to low 50s in weekly mileage, not because more wouldn’t help, but because it’s what her body and life stage can currently support. Her point for anyone comparing themselves to higher-mileage runners: “that’s so great for them,” but it doesn’t have to be your own metric for legitimacy.

Progress Isn’t Linear, and Missed Runs Aren’t Failures

Every training block includes missed or shortened runs, and Francesca treats that as normal rather than a crisis, as long as it doesn’t become a consistent pattern. The real red flags are runs missed because of doom-scrolling at night or repeated excuse-making, not the occasional alarm that didn’t go off or a run moved because a kid needed something. Letting go of the ego tied to a “perfect” training log, something she says got easier with age and experience, was a bigger unlock than any specific training tweak.

Fitness Is a Deposit You Take Out, Not a Ladder You Climb

After a big race, the goal isn’t to maintain peak fitness, it’s to rest so the next training block can start from a higher floor than the last one did. Francesca built in two full weeks off after her 50-miler without anxiety about losing progress, because that anxiety misunderstands how fitness actually works. Runners who stack race after race without real recovery, or maintain daily run streaks regardless of how their body feels, are often setting themselves up for injury or burnout rather than showing dedication.

Mom Guilt Is Real, and Protecting Your Time Still Matters

Francesca was honest about the guilt that comes with leaving her kids for a long run on a Saturday morning, especially given how much of the week she’s already away for work. Her reframe: if she doesn’t protect time for herself, she shows up more overstimulated and less present with her family, not more. That doesn’t mean ignoring family needs, it means recognizing that a parent running on empty isn’t actually the more selfless choice.

Fueling Every Run Made the Difference

Francesca fuels every run, even ones as short as 60 minutes, not as a flex but because it’s simply what her training has become. Her advice extends beyond ultras: if you want to try a new fueling strategy, test it on a short run first, not a long one, so a GI issue doesn’t derail hours of training. Her top wish for the broader running and fitness industry: more people embracing proper fueling as a performance tool instead of something to minimize or avoid.

Guest Bio

Francesca Barbetta is a certified run coach, marathoner, and full-time working mom of three. Since 2012, she has completed 12 marathons, 21 half marathons, and 3 ultramarathons, including her first 50-miler in May 2026. Find her on Instagram at @theearlymorningmotherrunner.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do you train for an ultramarathon while working full time and raising kids? Build training around your actual schedule rather than an idealized one: protect a consistent structure (like one long run day and dedicated strength days), keep weekly mileage at a sustainable level rather than chasing high volume, and accept that some runs will get missed or shortened without treating that as a failure.

Is it normal to feel guilty about taking time for training as a parent? Yes, this is commonly described as “mom guilt,” and it’s a common experience for parents balancing serious training with family responsibilities. Many parents find that protecting time for their own training actually makes them more present and less overstimulated with their families, rather than taking away from that time.

Why do some runners lose their motivation after a big race? Runners often don’t take enough recovery time after a big race and training block, both physically and mentally, before expecting to feel excited about running again. A lack of post-race joy is frequently a sign that more rest is needed, not a signal that something is wrong with your relationship to the sport.

How much should I fuel during shorter training runs? Fueling isn’t only necessary for long runs. Practicing your fueling strategy on shorter runs, even 30 to 60 minutes, is a low-risk way to test new products or approaches before relying on them for a long run or race, since a shorter run limits how long you’d be dealing with any GI discomfort.